Explorer Log: Entry 8 - The gifts of Impermanence
Time is always in motion, but some months seem to amplify change more than others. September is one that seems ripe with transition. For many it marks the end of one season and start of another, bringing changes in weather, new school year, new activities, shifting priorities, review and refocus heading into Q4, and the wheels begin to slowly turn on the holiday train that will continue to gain momentum until we’re hurdling straight through the end of December. Significant change for one of the shorter calendar months.
Change is often hard for us humans. Even if change is the only constant, as Greek philosopher Heraclitus opined, it is often wrought with discomfort. Our reptilian brains are wired for survival and to detect threats, both real and perceived. Unfortunately our amygdala cannot distinguish between physical and emotional danger, so we tend to react with a survival mechanism – fight, flight, freeze, etc. – even if there is the perception of an emotional threat. My 6 year old is struggling with this right now, quick to anger even with a simple misalignment of expectations.
Change is an example of an emotional threat. If things are changing how can I create plans, control outcomes, define strategy, motivate my team, navigate the unknown? So often we crave stability, permanence, even when we know this is not possible or sustainable. Change, impermanence is seen as something to avoid whenever possible.
But Buddhist monk Thich Nhan Hanh teaches that change is not what causes our discomfort:
“It is not impermanence that makes us suffer. What makes us suffer is wanting things to be permanent when they are not.” ― Thích Nhất Hạnh
As a leader, in this season of transition, how can you reframe transitions? What would it look like to embrace impermanence? What might a different relationship to change unlock?
My work is bringing my clients greater calm, clarity and confidence. Here are some reflections on how each would benefit from letting go of resistance to change:
Calm – Rather than resist change and experience disappointment, worry, resentment or other frustration, we can choose to embrace the understanding that change is constant and thus experience calm amidst change. Inviting calm becomes part of the inner work even when things around you are shifting. I think of a buoy which remains upright even when the water churns and the wind howls. What analogy might illuminate a sense of calm amidst change in your life?
Clarity – What becomes clear when we let go of the desire for permanence? We begin to open up to new possibilities, to consider different solutions, to notice patterns new to us. The perspective gained in impermanence comes with a different sense of time and place, a different relationship to self and others.
Confidence – With change comes a sense of uncertainty, lacking, insufficiency. We hold on to stories that we don’t have enough of something or we need to be different in some way. What if, instead, we consider the possibility that we are capable; that our ability to learn, grow and develop are internal changes reflective of the impermanence in our external environment? That we can meet change with deep belief in our own abilities rather than giving our power away to the forces of rumination about the past and worry about the future? What might that reframe unlock within you?
Still not sure what impermanence means or how to connect it back to your leadership? Get outside! There is so much that nature can teach us about change. Watch a tree near you over the coming weeks and consider what is permanent, what shifts, and how that impacts the integrity of the whole. Listen to birds, bees, crickets and reflect on their patterns across the seasons, how these creatures shift with change rather than fight it. Look for migrating flocks and butterflies and consider their relationship to impermanence. Read about perennial flowers and how they thrive amidst change, asking what you can learn from their adaptability.
What is the opportunity for you in this new season?
⭐️ I am deeply invested in you being the best leader that you can be, and partner with clients on three things:
✅ Bringing calm to the chaos
✅ Having clarity in decision making
✅ Maintaining confidence in their leadership
That’s what you get when you work with me - ✨ calm, clarity, and confidence. Interested? Curious? Know someone who might benefit from this work? Let me know and let's explore, together.
Schedule a free introductory call: https://calendly.com/mcl_coach/30min
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